eBook PDF / e-Pub Calico Jack in your Garden

Calico Jack in your Garden (Rating: 3.51 - 3459 votes)

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Title:Calico Jack in your Garden
Format Type:Ebook
Author:
Publisher:eBooks
ISBN:
ISBN 13:
Number of Pages:
Category:Humor, Fiction, Funny, Comedy

Calico Jack in your Garden by Karl Wiggins

PDF, EPUB, MOBI, TXT, DOC Calico Jack in your Garden Embarrassingly a number of the reviews for this book seem to involve people losing control of their bladder .

Anyone who is a bit saucy very fond of boobies and doesn t mind peeing slightly when they laugh too hard this is the book for you I have to admit that I wet myself twice while reading it but this may in part have been due to my age and a couple of bottles of a fine St Emilion Due to the laughter you owe my secretary one clean pair of knickers .

Two reviewers have even suggested I should tour as a stand up comedian .

I found myself laughing out loud and even sharing segments with my spouse I think Karl could tour as a stand up comedian Mr Wiggins has views on life that are expressed in a manner worthy of any stand up comedian .

So my scribblings do seem to raise a smile and a chuckle and either way you look at it that has to be a good thing .

I got kicked out of bed TWICE for laughing so hard This is by far one of the funniest books I ve yet read .

JFC This is soooo hilarious .

I have never ever read a book that caught me so unawares and made me laugh so much as Calico Jack I laughed and laughed so much on the train home that I had to stop reading it He is capable of making the reader cry with laughter .

There were times when I had to set the Kindle down and just laugh out loud Some of Mr Wiggins thoughts are just hilarious .

Whilst it s evident that a number of people love my writing I ve even been told by some that they settle themselves with a cup of coffee before reading my blogs Newspaper columns or Facebook posts I m very much aware that I have an inappropriate sense of humour that isn t to everyone s taste In short not everyone gets me .

Hardly any subject is taboo to the Englishman when he s laughing and this often seems insensitive to other cultures but the bedrock of the British sense of humour is a strong sense of sarcasm and self deprecation The British can be very passionate and if you doubt that try going to a football match but that passion is often hidden deep in our humour so that other nationals fail to not only recognise the deadpan delivery but are never too sure if they ve been involved in a serious conversation or just a little bit of friendly banter Having said that my style of writing is now appealing more and more to the American market .

No longer simply a fad blogging is now an important new literary innovation This book is not a story and if you re looking for a book that is all sweetness and light please give this one a miss It s not for you I won t be offended and I honestly wish you a great life If everyone likes me then I m not being controversial enough .

If you re looking for Humorous books about Life Comedy Writing or even Humorous Books for Adults then take a chance on this book .

I ve been told I write with an easy going style and a zest for living that is infectious I m not so sure about that but I have an opinion on a range of hot issues although you don t have to agree with all my views to enjoy the ride Other comments on my writing style warn that I talk to the reader with all the confidence of a man in touch with his own reality in a voice which is seasoned with a hint of world weariness that is so telling of a writer who has written what he knows and written it with disarming fearlessness And that I guess is true .

I can be a handful at times and I know it I m strong willed a bit outspoken and I write exactly what I m thinking It s not to everyone s taste but this is a book you can dip in and out of whenever the mood takes you I hope you enjoy

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The Opening Line, Goodnight, and Thanks for the Vodka, You Really Are Full of Shit, Aren't You?, Self-Publishing In the Eye of the Storm, Nobody Asked Me, But ...., GRIT The Banter and Brutality of the Late-Night Cab, Calico Jack in your Garden, Words are our Sorcery, Dogshit Saved My Life, Shit my History Teacher DID NOT tell me!
The world of the cab driver is uncertain and even dangerous populated by oddballs weirdoes comedians eccentrics head cases prima donnas and hard cases And they re just the drivers br br Enter the ludicrous humorous and sometimes violent world of the London cab driver You never know what to expect and during my years driving cabs I got myself into some scrapes br br Luckily I ve met and befriended many characters along the way and their stories deserve to be told br br In the last third of the book I recall my time spent driving cab in the projects of Watts Los Angeles home of the infamous Bloods amp Crips during the early s I ve intended to paint an ominous picture of a community destroyed by drugs guns and violence You ll almost smell the omnipresent whiff of cheap wine and feel the dirty lino under your feet br br Read the true life adventures of an English lad as he struggles to make a living amongst gangstas who are arguably the most violent in the United States br br For anyone who has puked in the back of a cab then argued over the fare at am this book is your driver s revenge I ve done my best to create a living poem that is by turns thoughtful and brutal but very funny br br People have always told me I m a natural storyteller but like every good cab driver I have an opinion on a range of hot issues from the congestion charge to Malcolm X and the Nation of Islam br br You ll be able to hear my characters see them and in some instances actually smell them They ll leave their stain on you You may well be able to relate to guys who used their fists and their wits you may laugh at their humour and get their jokes but it ll be the thugs with guns and no soul who will unsettle you I want you to be scared of them, If you re a history or philosophy buff this book should be as irresistible as a kebab to a pisshead br br So what s it all about then History that s what Errgghhh boring boring bollocks boring I had enough of that crap when I was at school History just went on and on and on and on and on and on and on Nothing different ever happened br br Well that s where you re wrong because I m going to bring it alive Not all history books or even books about teaching history have to be tedious I ve looked under every rock in every nook and cranny I ve searched all over the place and dug up some really interesting little titbits Stuff not a lot of people know br br So stay with me on this one I ve chosen to look at past events from the birth of the planet to the birth of Christ That s enough for one book isn t it Well not really because I ve gone off track a little bit from time to time but I do tend to do that so don t worry about it br br If you ve got a teenager who s studying the history of this period download a copy for them now because it s all laid out nice and clear But let me warn you I have in the past been accused of having an inappropriate sense of humour so if you want a little bit of a chuckle watching me make fun out of everyone I meet down the years then this is the book for you and if your offspring is in their early teens then it probably isn t the book for them br br As I say I do tend to stray into the modern day from time to time to bring things into focus but I promise you this book will surprise you inform you keep you interested and put a smile on your face from time to time br br I discuss philosophers and philosophy a lot including ancient Greek philosophers Chinese beliefs and philosophy from around the world but if you think it s all Socrates Plato and Aristotle there s a lot more here to be discovered You ll be surprised for instance at the similarities between the Celts and the Native Americans The Rosicrucians will fascinate you as will some of the secrets held by Alexander the Great br br It s high time we had some history books for adults, No description available, No description available